


Champion Less

by deathmarkedlove_archivist



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-29
Updated: 2007-01-29
Packaged: 2019-05-10 04:14:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14729756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathmarkedlove_archivist/pseuds/deathmarkedlove_archivist
Summary: After Tabula Rasa, Spike decided he's going to leave town, sick of Buffy's games. Will Buffy be able to convince him to stay? PG-13





	Champion Less

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Champion Less (1/1)  
> Author: Trina Rego
> 
> Copyright: November 13, 2001
> 
> Rating: PG-13
> 
> Summary: After Tabula Rasa, Spike decided he's going to leave town, sick of  
> Buffy's games. Will Buffy be able to convince him to stay? (This is just a  
> short fic I wrote because I was mad at Buffy.)
> 
> Timeline: After Tabula Rasa
> 
> Distribution: Please! Anywhere! Just tell me!
> 
> Spoilers: Once More With Feeling and Tabula Rasa
> 
> Feedback: Please! Even if you don't like it, just let me know! It's my first  
> B/S fic, so I would really like some feedback on it!

She was a bitch.

A cold-hearted bitch at that; didn't care about anyone but her damn self.

But still he loved her. And that was what killed him. He loved her, woulddo anything for her, but still she rejected him time and time again. He had proved himself to her, shown he wasn't the monster she thought he was. Her mum (though gone now), her sister, and even her friends had accepted him.But no, it was never good enough for her. And now, with the kissing, and then leaving, and then kissing, and then leaving. He sighed, it was just too much.

Spike looked down at a puddle. It had been steadily pouring for an hour now, and he was soaked to the bone. It didn't matter though, he could ignore the rain, even ignore the fact that it was freezing outside. He was always cold anyone, dead men didn't generate a lot of heat. He sighed. This is what he'd been reduced to, sitting in the pouring rain in the back of an alley. He had come here to pay the Loan Shark back, and had decided to stay, not wanting to run into Buffy while she was on patrol. Sure he wanted to see her, wanted to do more than that. He wanted to take her in his arms, comfort her, and tell her everything would be allright. It was what she wanted to. It was what she needed. But she couldn't accept that.And her kiss and run act was getting pretty damn absurd. He could only take  
so much. And for her to kiss him like that and brush it off as nothing, or runaway as if it had never happened. It wasn't worth it, not in the long run.

*

Buffy awoke to a soft pounding at the door. Well, soft only because the rain was beating so hard on the roof. She had fallen asleep on the couch watching an old movie. She quickly went to the door and opened it to find Spike standing there. His blonde hair was a mess, sticking out in every which way, and his clothes were soaking wet and plastered to him. "Spike? What are you doing here?" She looked at a clock, "It's three in the morning!"

"I need to talk to you." His voice was low and serious.

"Well come in then." Buffy gestured for him to come inside.

He shook his head. "I don't have much to say, and I'm not gonna get your house all wet. I don't need to come in."

"Look, you're coming in, it's freezing out there. I'm not standing in front of an open door." She told him.

Spike sighed and took one tentative step through the doorway. Buffy pulled him the rest of the way through and closed the door behind him. "So what? None of the usual cocky comments about my house, or my pajamas, or my hair?"

"Not in the mood." Spike replied. She rolled at this. 'Always with the eye rolling, someday there gonna roll right outa her damn head.' Spike thought. "Look Buffy, I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?" She asked.

'Oh as if she doesn't know!' "This! This whole you kissing me then being all 'Denial!Buffy' about how you really feel!"

"How I feel? How do you know how I feel?"

"Oh here we go, the whole 'no one knows my true feelings but me' bit! You wear you're heart on your sleeve Buffy."

"Look maybe I just feel like kissing somebody, and you just happen to be there at the time!"

"That is not true and you know it! Look I didn't come here to talk about this, I came to here to tell you that I'm leaving."

A look of shock appeared on her face, "Le-Leaving?" She stuttered.

"Ya, leaving, Sunnydale, for good." There was a look of tremendous sadness in his eyes as he said this. "You know I love you Buffy and I would do anything for you. But this is just.it's too hard to do this."

"So you're just leaving?"

""Consider the odds! Consider the obvious! The fire is meaningless; this campaign died in the planning stages, and these falling faces are the singular proof it was ever alive. You're never going to think of me as anything more than some demon, or a monster, or that guy you kiss once and awhile. I just can't do it." Spike shook his head, "Tell Dawn-tell her I'm  
sorry." With that he was gone before Buffy could do anything. She heard a choked sob come from the top of the stairs and turned to see Dawn sitting there tears running down her face. Before Buffy could say anything Dawn ran into the room and slammed the door. Buffy felt her own tears run down her  
face as she stared at the door.

*

Spike slowly put whatever belongings he had in ratty old duffle bag. He had found it in the basement of the Magic Box a long time ago, figuring it would come in handy sometime. He never figured he would use it for this. He didn't want to leave, but it was the only choice he had left. He couldn't stick around and let her use him. Spike heard the door of his crypt swing open  
and turned to see Dawn standing there. "You bastard!" She yelled at him.

"Dawn I-

She walked over to him and punched him squarely in the jaw, "Shut up!" She cried, and Spike could see tears running down her face, "You're leaving me! You can't leave me!"

Spike grabbed her shoulders, she tired to push against him, but he was too strong and she gave him crying against his chest. He put his arms around her and stroked her hair. "It'll be ok I promise lil' bit."

"No, it won't! You're my best friend Spike, you are the only one who understands me-and now you're just leaving! All because of stupid Buffy! God I hate her!"

"No you don't, this isn't her fault." Spike told her.

"Yes it is! If she could just admit that she-

"Dawn."

Both Dawn and Spike turned to see Buffy standing at the door. "Dawn, please, go home. I want to talk to Spike."

Dawn started to protest but Spike shook his head and she walked out of the crypt, glaring at Buffy on her way out.

"Spike, you can't do this."

"I can and I am."

"You're being a coward, you're running from your problems!"

"Kinda like you?" Spike snapped, "If I could just keep my mind from thinking how I had you once, but I'll never forget that. Sometimes I wish I could loose you again, but that's not really what I want. This is a last resort Buffy, but I've got no reason to stay."

"What about me?"

"I already told you I loved you Buffy. You take advantage of that. I'm not staying here to be your little lap dog, or someone you go to to forget about your problems. I love you too much to be used like that."

"But-I-I need you!" She fought hard to keep the tears that were forming behind her eyes from spilling out.

"Need me, ya. Need me to fight demons for you when you don't feel like it.Need me to play tonsil hockey with you when you feel like forgetting your life instead of doing something to solve it. I'm not the hypocrite here Buffy, you are!"

"You say you love me.you say you would do anything for me! Then stay!"

"Why? Give me one good reason, one reason! And I'll stay. And this is one time you can't fake it hard enough to please everyone.or anyone at all."

His eyes burned into hers, asking her for the truth, begging her for it.And she wanted to give into those sharp blue eyes, loose herself in them.He was right, as of right now; he had no reason to stay. She was using him, and he deserved more than that, he deserved the truth. "I begged you not to go, I begged you, and I pleaded. I pegged you as my only hope.but you're not  
that.the truth is I love you."

He didn't say anything for a moment, as if he had been expecting another answer. Before she knew what had happened, he was kissing her, with such a passion and hunger it felt like they hadn't seen eachother in years. "I'm so sorry Spike." She whispered against his lips. He looked at her and she could see tears running down his cheeks. She didn't think she'd ever seen him cry before. It hurt to her to no end to know she was the cause of his pain. She kissed his forehead tenderly. "I do love you."

"I believe you." He said softly.

"And I meant what I said before, I do need you. Please don't ever leave me." Buffy knew she was pleading, but she didn't care. "Being with you was the moment I opened my eyes."

"I know. And I will never leave you, ever." He could think of nothing else to say, he was some helpless fool lost in a swarm of peace. She was all he needed, wanted to see, hear, or think about. He was glad he didn't have to breathe, he didn't think he would be able to at this point. And yet he still wondered, why? Why had she never told him anything before now? Why had she made him suffer like that?

As if she could read his mind she answered, "I was scared. Scared of everything. But I guess I've always been scared, of love, I mean."

"Love is like a shooting star, it don't matter who you are. If you only run for cover it's just a waste of time. You can't run away from love Buffy, not when you know it's there."

She looked at him and kissed him softly, "I know that now. " She stepped closer to him now, to the love that she had found. She kissed him again; it was like the first time they had kissed. And for once she knew that everything would by all right. She had found where she needed, no wanted, to be.

THE END


End file.
